The address was either 1742 Endar or it was 174 Zendar. Neither street name rang a bell. He gave it another look. Or it was 114 Zendar, possibly 1142 Endar. Dammit.
The client had indicated that the place was easy to locate. "You can't miss it," was the exact phrase. Clearly, he'd never met Equis.
Equis wiped his brow again and then slipped into the doorway of some random shop, taking shelter in a slight patch of shadow. He leaned his head against the white brick of the building and then, when he discovered the stone to be cooler than he'd first imagined, pressed the rest of his exposed skin against it as well. Ah, now that's the stuff.
If there was anything Equis could stand less that war, famine and pestilence it was the temperature being above 85 degrees. Add in humidity and that pretty much equaled death. Or misery, but who can really tell the difference. It was like a dog collar set to the tightest notch, cutting off his air flow, and its leash cruelly tugged on at random times, just to keep things interesting.
Equis slogged in as much of the moist, oppressive air as he could manage and closed his eyes. This was the first case he'd had in weeks and he couldn't afford to loose the job simply because his directional skills were nonexistent or because he'd passed out from heat stroke. Then again, passing out wasn't high on his list of things he wanted to do in the first place. It was right at the bottom with walking twenty miles in ninety-plus degree, one hundred percent humidity and having his fingernails pried off with needle nose pliers. It was just one of those things.
Then again, lounging against a wall, no matter how appealing its smooth, cool surface felt, wasn't getting him any closer to his next paycheck. Equis shoved himself away from the siren call chill of the wall and pushed the shop door inward. A bell chimed and then chimed again as Equis closed the door behind him, scanning the room.
The store didn't seem to be much of a store at all. Unless it was an empty, could-I-possibly-interest-you-in-this-top-quality-patch-of-air sort of affair. It resembled an under funded banquet that didn't quite make it to the celebration portion of the evening. The stark walls framed a table and a few chairs and the back of the shop was closed off by a plain paper room divider. It was all the folding kind, all the better to clear that hopping dance floor.
"Be right there." The cheerful tone that came from beyond the divider was accompanied by the scent of cheap ramen soup. The party just kept getting better and better. After a few seconds, the speaker revealed himself. It was a kid, about fifteen, brown hair trimmed short enough that it stood up of its own accord, big blue eyes, jeans, T-shirt with the words, "Shop Smart, Shop S-Mart(1)," screen printed across the front, large McDonald's cup clutched in one hand. A hood rat. Oh, yeah. Now the party was in full swing.
The kid flashed him a smile with the power of at least a year of experience at one of the nation's fine retailers and delivered the five word phrase every salesman would either learn to worship or bury in the very bowels of hell itself. "How can I help you?"
"What kind of-" Equis cut himself off. He was already more than twenty minutes late for his meeting. It didn't matter what the kid was selling and considering there wasn't any merchandise it doubly didn't matter. "I need some directions. Do you know where-"
This time he was cut off by the kid. "Forty dollars is a little pricey just for directions, don't you think?"
Where the hell did that come from? "What are you talking about? What forty dollars?"
"That's my base price. Didn't you read the window?" He took a sip of his Mickey D's brand soda and launched into a spiel. "Simple reading, forty dollars. Simple readings include palm and aura. In depth reading, sixty dollars. In depth readings include tarot and crystal. Anything else is at my discretion. So, what'll it be?"
Did he hear that correctly? "You're a psychic?"
The kid laughed. "You really didn't read the window." He dropped into a bow, deep and elegant enough to force Equis to reassess the "hood rat" label. "Psychic Thaine, at your service. I believe you needed some directions, Mr. Equis?" Thaine the Seer's new label became "complete mystery."
"I'm not about to shell out forty bucks for a psychic reading just to get them!" Equis' instant replay brain threw Thaine's last question back at him and his mouth went dry. "I never told you my name."
Thaine didn't smile, he smirked. The smirk encompassed all that was ego and pride and neener-neener you didn't believe I was a psychic, did you, jerk-off. "No, you didn't." The kid's eyes narrowed as if to say, "You like that? How 'bout I twist the arrow and throw salt on the wound? Won't that be fun?"
An icy creek had taken up its new home in the valley of Equis' spine. He'd encountered a lot of scary shit in his life, but this kid's expression was just plain freaky. The funny thing about it was that Equis was positive Thaine had no clue that he was giving off a something-scraping-at-the-foot-of-your-bed aura. It was completely unintentional.
"Do you prefer Mr. Dos?" Equis hated his full name. The first part was fine. The second part was better, but put them together and wasn't that just a hoot? A slap your knee, I can't stop crying it's so goddamn funny, hoot. Named after an imported beer. Thank you overworked child services. Dos, goddamn, Equis. They should have stuck to John Doe. "Or do you just want those directions? Where you headed?"
Equis waved a hand in negation. "Forget it. I'm broke."
"On the house," the kid offered with a genuine smile which faded after a couple of seconds. "I didn't just scare you, did I? I was just trying to show you what I could do and that wasn't even a reading. I know you're a skeptic so I wanted you to know that I'm the real thing." He paused to take a breath and his voice took on a pleading tone, "I need customers."
Equis managed to avoid rolling his eyes out of sheer determination. Don't we all? "A little advice?" Thaine nodded. "Ask first. And watch your eyes. That look you gave me is damn creepy."
"Ask first?" Thaine repeated, balling his fists up in knots. "I didn't read you. I already told you that."
"I know that, but your next customer might not." Equis placed a hand on Thaine's head. It was meant to be a gesture of comfort, to soothe the psychic's wounded pride, but as soon as his hand touched the kid's hair the urge to yank his hand away was almost overwhelming. An icy heat surrounded Thaine's entire body. Equis willed his hand to stay put. "It's alright, kid. It's simple. Just ask. If someone's not interested they'll make it clear."
Equis wasn't sure where the compulsion to help Thaine came from, but it wheedled at the base of his skull and four words chiseled into his brain floated to the surface. Power Calls to Power. Just that, but even after years of exposure to the phrase, Equis had never truly believed it. Until now. And this kid was screaming to be heard.
Sometimes it's keeping those interested away that's the problem.
Thaine looked up, blinking back the tears Equis had suspected. "You're not a skeptic." It was a hard statement, backed with confidence. "Who are you, Dos Equis?"
Equis cringed, letting his hand slide free at last. "Equis. Just Equis and if you want to know anything else I'll trade you for those directions. I don't do 'On the house.' It's too much like, 'you owe me one.'"
Thaine nodded. "Where you headed?"
The paper in Equis' left hand crinkled. "Some church by the name of St. Augustine's?... St. Augustus?..." He checked the completely unreadable note. "St. Guillotine?... St. Gatorade!?! I know that's not it." He crumpled the paper and stuffed it in his pocket. "Some big, flashy church that's supposed to be impossible to miss."
Thaine frowned in concentration. "St. Anagura?"
"That's it!"
"I can get you there, no problem." He paused. "It's not like people are lining up here, I can take you there if you want."
Equis thought of the poor, dead note in its pocket grave and nodded. "That sounds like a great idea." He reached for the door handle.
Thaine held out a hand, palm up. "It's cash up front." Equis thought he'd established the fact of his lack of funds and then Thaine enlightened him. "Who are you, Mr. Equis?"
"Oh, me?" He flashed his own winning smile. "I'm an exorcist. No creepy to scary, no crawlie to gross, no-" Equis was knocked out of his sales pitch.
Thaine had tripped over thin air, taking Equis, the room divider and his paper McDonald's cup with him. The kid jumped up before Equis realized what exactly happened and then helped Equis to his feet. "Sorry."
"What happened? Are you okay?"
"Yup," the kid replied lightly. "Let's get moving. St. Anagura's not going anywhere and you're late for an appointment." He snatched open the door and then waved Equis ahead. The little bell cried out.
To be continued...