Disclaimer: Many organizations have come together to bring you this fanficiton fusion. Among them are: Bandai, Sunrise & Sotsu with Gundam Wing. Hans Christian Andersen and Disney with The Little Mermaid. Douglas Adams with A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Hiro Mashima, Kodansha and TOKYOPOP with Rave Master. PIXAR with Finding Nemo. Satoru Akahori, Ray Omishi, Media Works, Mixx Entertainment & ADV with Sorcerer Hunters. ROBOT, JFN, STEP, A.T. Interactive, AIC & VIZ Video with Trouble Chocolate. Rikdo Koshi, SHONENGAHOSHA & ADV with Excel Saga. You Hyun, DAIWAN & TOKYOPOP with Faerie's Landing. Yoko Matsushita, Hakusensha & VIZ for Yami no Matsuei. Kazuya Minekura, ISSAISHA, TOKYOPOP Inc., & ADV with Saiyuki. Yuu Watase, SHOGAKUKAN, VIZ & Pioneer with Fushigi Yuugi. 95.5 fm Detroit for Tic Tac and the Hot Girl Check In. And Ladybug Oblivion for forcing the project on me, denying me TV time, video game time, eating time (apparently I can type with one hand) and sleeping time until the thing was finished.
Warnings: Gratuitous cameo appearances (as you can see from the extensive disclaimer), numerous (and quite unnecessary) quotes, and minor character bashing (including but not limited to Quatre, Catherine, Hilde and most especially Relena.) Shonen-ai.
He put on his best "Little Innocent Me" face and resolutely chose a spot near the bottom of the queen's fin to stare. "I'm sorry. I just forgot that it was today."
"Do not use that expression on me." Duo dropped the act. "It is your birthday. You forgot that today is your birthday?"
She had him there. Duo had never forgotten a birthday in his life. He certainly wouldn't forget one as important as his sixteenth and he most especially wouldn't forget after harping on everyone about how excited he was about it for the past six weeks. "No, ma'am."
"I expect better of you, Duo. You are my only son. You will rule one day and you need to set an example for your people. This is the wrong kind of example."
"But it wasn't his fault," blurted Quatre, swimming out and then placing himself defiantly between Duo and his mother. "There was a shark that was going to eat us for dinner! And the poor girl fish he said was sweet and the clowns and the group, the Friends of the Fish Food, and then the seagull lost his wings and Wufei said-"
"Seagull? Wufei?" Queen Une laced her lithe fingers together, leaning ever so slightly forward in her throne. "You are still speaking with that knave?"
"Quatre? Are you trying to get me killed?" At the prince's look the little fish, slapped his forehead, just realizing what he'd done.
"I am the one you are speaking to, son. Do not forget that." Great. Now, she was livid.
"Wufei isn't a knave," he said as reasonably as possible. "He's my friend."
"Friend or foe, the boy believes in nothing but war. You will not bring that down upon your house. Do you understand me?"
"Listen, mom-"
"You will not speak with that fighter again."
"But-"
"You will not so much as break the surface of this ocean."
"Yeah, but-"
"You will not meet with Chang Wufei."
"Mo-om-"
"Do I make myself perfectly clear?"
"Crystal."
"You are dismissed."
Duo gave a curt nod and fled the throne room.
Her advisor held both his tongue and his position to the right of the throne.
"Perhaps he needs supervision." Silence. "Perhaps he needs someone to keep him on track." Still no response. "I trust you can handle it."
"Ma'am," replied Trowa before bowing out to chase down the headstrong prince.
He caught sight of his ward just as the boy was leaving palace waters. He followed his charge past the city limits and into the abandoned slums of Atlantica. The prince finally came to a halt at the doors of a beat up warehouse. The sign of the warehouse declared, "Maxwell Church's Crazy Emporium of Insane Deals! Where Lunatics Rule and Sane People Drool!"
There was a tiny blip and the double doors slid open on silent tracks. Trowa waited for the doors to close and the shadowy silhouettes to dissolve before approaching the building to pick the electronic lock. It was tricky work. Prince Duo certainly knew his locks and he had chosen the best for his crappy looking ex-Emporium. What could he possibly need such a big lock for?
The doors swooshed open, admitting the queen's lackey. The warehouse was nearly bursting at the seams with various vehicle parts, mostly from ships and aircraft, but a few automobile parts were strewn throughout the mess. Laughter flowed from the back, where a particularly tall pile of metal obscured its source. Trowa snuck in behind a airplane engine, peeking around the edge at his target.
"You should've seen your face, Q," Prince Duo was saying. "It was a real Kodak moment." He imitated Quatre by making a big O of his mouth, somehow screwing up the pupils of his eyes and then slapping himself on the forehead hard enough to scramble his brain. "You looked like she was gonna eat ya!"
"Shut up! It wasn't that funny," whined the fish. "And I think she really was gonna have Mr. Zechs fry me up for dinner!"
"Nah! She's more the sushi type and that's more Trieze's field. Cold cuts, anyone!" he called over his shoulder, coincidentally toward his stalker. Trowa flattened himself against the floor.
"Your mother eats sushi?!?" squealed Quatre, holding both hands over his mouth. "Cannibal!"
"Only tuna so you're safe... I think."
A look of horror froze on Quatre's face. "So, that's what happened to Charlie. Poor Charlie."
A sparkle of amusement bolted through the prince's eyes, but he didn't disavow the fish of his conclusion. He clapped his hands and placed an arm around his friend, guiding him to the tall pile of rubble. "What's important now is this radio. Wufei said that it can go into a Gundam, so we have ta make it fit."
A Gundam? As in a weapon of mass destruction? Queen Une was not going to like the sound of that.
Suddenly, Trowa found a blade at his throat. "Oh, hey, Music Man," beamed Prince Duo. "Mom send ya?"
No use in lying. "Yes," Trowa replied slipping away from the business end of the scythe while avoiding any sudden movement.
"Trowa?" Quatre blinked into the shadows, only just getting a glimpse of the intruder. "What are you doing here?"
He couldn't seem to resist answering the question. "My mission is to keep Prince Duo on track."
"On track? Don't ya mean out of trouble?"
"You're not gonna rat us out, are you Trowa?" Quatre batted his eyes and then swam nearly up to Trowa's nose. "You're not gonna nark on me, are you?" He gave a little whimper, tears pooling in his aquamarine eyes. "Not on me?"
That's right. If he squealed on Duo, he'd be squealing on Quatre. Duo would live through the experience. Trowa wasn't so sure little Quatre would. The queen had already taken a disliking to the prince's sidekick. "Uh... no?" Why did he always feel so unsure of himself when the little fish was around?
"Good job, Quat!" The prince dropped the scythe and then pounded Quatre on the back, practically knocking the fish into the nearest pile of junk. "Give 'im the ol' guilt trip. Nicely done." Grinning, Quatre sat back, wiped the tears from his eyes and then gave a thumbs up. "We have your word on that?" The last was directed to the prone Trowa.
He'd just been played. And by Quatre of all people. Cute, innocent little Quatre. Trowa killed the sigh rising up his throat, nodded his defeat and received a Quatre necklace as a reward. "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!"
"Now that that's settled," began the prince, "Do you have any idea how to connect a radio to a Gundam?"